Ugh.

This weekend was another hard weekend in the world of this infertile broad. Friday we ran into a lesbian couple who we had over for dinner back in November. They were talking about trying to get pregnant.

Friday when we see them at the festival I noticed she was pregnant. Great. Not only that...but they're having triplets.

I just kept thinking -- god damnit, why does this always work for EVERYONE else...but not for us.

I'm so tired of thinking that way...but it's true.

Then of course Saturday we had to go get a shower gift for L&L's shower this coming up weekend. Margot had no idea what to get and didn't have the time. So we went Saturday. This time Margot broke down in Target and said "I'm sorry for asking you to do this".

It was one of the first times I've seen her cry over all of this and either it's getting to her too or she's becoming more sensitive to how it's affecting me.

I'm not going to the shower because I think it will just be too painful. We were due just three weeks apart.

Honestly, each time I see her I wonder why couldn't I still be pregnant. It's painful... even if I try hard to ignore it and just move forward.